I spent this afternoon with Robert Cialdini (yes, the Influence guy).

Cialdini was speaking at the Fortune Small Business Conference and I went with my friend Donna Fox to record an interview with him.

I’ll post a link to that interview when it’s done.

He told us about some new information and I asked if I could share it. So you’ll be among the first to hear..

On the subject of Likability, Cialdini told us that all of the sales training that says that you need to get people to like you is wrong. You know, the “find out what their hobbies are.. what you have in common so you can bond” stuff.

He explained that this will often come off as a fake. And here is the reason why.

To really bond with a person, you should focus on liking them. Really, sincerely liking the people you meet and want to influence. Once you find a real reason to like them, it’s much easier for them to like you.

People buy from those they know, like and trust. The best way to be likable is to like people